Snorers come in varieties. Some snorers belong in the incidental category; others in the repititious and perpetual. Some snore for a while and stop; others snore like there is no tomorrow. Some snore softly like the sound of a passing breeze; some others more whiffy like a gust of wind; and there are those that thunder.

The question that always plagued me was, "How come the really loud snorers don't hear themselves?"

I am told that I seldom snore, and if I do, it is akin to a person whispering in a library. So I am told. That begs another question: "How can one rate one's own snore amongst the rest, both in its loudness and persistence?" Of course, I have to tape my own snore to know what it sounds like albeit the problem remains as I belong in the category of an incidental snorer, not the perpetual.

A couple of my own experiences with snorers come to mind. I am sure you have your own experiences, far better than what I am about to relate. And feel free to share after reading mine.

My very dear friend KK had a dog by name Pluto Panchapakesan, a dalmatian. When I came to stay with KK in Chennai from Chicago a few years back, he provided me with a nicely furnished A/C room. And Pluto conveniently plonked himself next to me when I went to bed. It was summer so the dog preferred not so much my company but the coolness of the room. I had a very difficult time sleeping next to a snoring dog. Given that he was habitually crazy (a story I will get into another time) I tried to move him gently to a different position so that he would stop snoring. The more I moved him, the louder the snore became so I went to the veranda where he normally slept. I didn't mind since it was a recipocal geographical arrangement, nothing else.

The next morning when KK's wife asked me why I was all curled up in the veranda when they had painstakingly arranged a nice guest room for me, I told her the truth. All she could do was laugh. "Pluto just takes after his Master. Believe me, you ain't seen nothing unless you sleep next to KK like I do. The Richter Scale would go kaput if it measured his resonance!"

I laughed it off as a courtesy on her part to make me feel good.

But then when KK came to stay with me in Chicago, we gave him a comfortable bedroom upstairs. Being next door, I heard his snoring for the first time. I thought I was dreaming about two polar bears during the mating season. I didn't want to say anything to my wife for she had already fallen asleep with two pillows pressed against each ear.

The next morning when KK arrived downstairs for breakfast, he mentioned that he had had a bad jet lag; perhaps he had snored loudly. My wife winked at me and politely replied, "No problem at all, KK. By the way, thanks for rearranging our furniture!"