An untrustworthy colleague

Sulekha.com

Feedback

Forums Beta

started by Pravalika Nanda 3 mnths ago

So the other day my mentor and the group of people he counsels including myself were to meet at Location A at 1pm. I arrived at Location A, characteristically five minutes ahead of the appointed time. I waited for twentyfive minutes. Nobody else showed up. fearing that the venue had changed and I was just unaware of it ( I hadn't checked my mail for 1.5 days and I had no cellphone with me) I went back to the conference room where we usually meet. My locker is next to the conference room and I went in, got my cellphone, used the desktop in the conference room and noted that there were no changes in the venue. Had it been cancelled? No. After two phone calls, my mentor picked up and told me that he had gotten lost as had the others and they were one by one slowly trickling in. I told him I'd come back to Location A.

But before I went back to Location A, I thought I'd wash my face with water and headed to the bathroom. Who do I find there, putting on makeup and perfume? - my colleague. It was now 45 minutes past 1. I usually never talk to this woman, we just don't gel. I washed my face with water, wiped it with a paper towel and she finished putting away her things and she said, "I'll wait for you." I said okay and in a minute we were both out of the bathroom and on our way to this Location A. We arrived at 215pm and the mentor looked at this woman and said, "oh, you got really lost!" and this woman said, "No, I was just waiting for Pravalika to get ready."

Can you imagine the nerve of this woman? At max, she waited for me for 2 minutes but was an hour and fifteen minutes late herself. She is fat, wears high heels, has her degree from a foreign country not known its for academic rigor, is supposedly a specialist in her field, and she makes up these lies in front of eight other people. I did not think I should upbraid her in front of everybody, and right after the meeting she ran off as quick as she could even as the rest of us still hung around discussing an exciting publication in one of our journals.

The staff just LOVES her...she really knows how to keep them feeling good. And whenever the topic of this woman comes up at the water cooler, everybody says, "yes, she's from such a different culture, it must be so difficult for her." I think 5 years in America is enough time to get adjusted, no one is lazier, dishonest, cunning, and slothful than she. But no one would ever believe me.

Reply

Flat Nested

Replies

hellsangel posted Re:An untrustworthy colleague on 3 mnths ago

Also I wouldn't feel so superior about one's native country. I don't think this country is known for its academic rigor but still...

Reply
Report Abuse

tejasvee posted Re:An untrustworthy colleague on 3 mnths ago

>>"No, I was just waiting for Pravalika to get ready."

Why didn't you say something immediately?

Also, when you were in the conf. room ahead of everyone in the first place, why didn't you leave something there to ensure everyone knows you were there? Like a notepad or pen..

Hide 1 reply
Reply
Report Abuse

Pravalika Nanda posted Re:An untrustworthy colleague on 3 mnths ago

It's weird to say something about it in front of anyone else or even to her directly. How does one reproach a 35 year old specialist?

Hide 1 reply
Reply
Report Abuse

tejasvee posted Re:An untrustworthy colleague on 3 mnths ago

Isn't it weird to 'suck in' an inappropriate excuse that she gave pretty much blaming you for her delay?

Reply
Report Abuse

hellsangel posted Re:An untrustworthy colleague on 3 mnths ago

The staff don't LOVE you?

Hide 2 replies
Reply
Report Abuse

Pravalika Nanda posted Re:An untrustworthy colleague on 3 mnths ago

No, I don't think I evoke such feelings at all. I don't think that's the way the staff and the secretaries should feel about you. But this woman gets a lot of love and sympathy and kindness.

They teamed me up with her for three weeks of the summer. It has been very annoying.

Reply
Report Abuse

Maria S posted Re:An untrustworthy colleague on 3 mnths ago

It's always that invisible "likeability" or "lovability" thing...people (no matter who they are) may forget everything else...but above all, they always remember how a woman looks and how she makes them feel- as in good/important (looking a little lost and helpless...does not hurt either!)

Call it what it totally sexist, and so not fair...

But then, who said life is ever fair most of the time?!

M

Hide 1 reply
Reply
Report Abuse

Pravalika Nanda posted Re:An untrustworthy colleague on 3 mnths ago

Yes, she always looks lost and helpless when it is time to do work. She's very good at asking people for favors. Part of the reason may be that she wears a scarf as she is muslim. I think that Americans, especially African_americans and Caucasians tend to view such people with great sympathy. They think that she is suffering because she is wearing a scarf and so they must be more gentle and kinder and leninet towards her.

When she makes mistakes, she counters with statements like " I could not understand you." It's all very fishy.

I can't stand this woman.

Hide 1 reply
Reply
Report Abuse

Maria S posted Re:An untrustworthy colleague on 3 mnths ago

They think that she is suffering because she is wearing a scarf and so they must be more gentle and kinder and leninet towards her.

_________

That is interesting...I see people dealing in extremes.....they are either afraid of women in scarves, or go overboard in "being sensitive" and treat them like victims (when they are clearly not)!

*I have always argued that women wearing scarves, Amish clothes, sarees, burkhas (anything which looks oppressive/old-fashioned in appearance)...can be very decieving! It may have absolutely nothing with how bold/liberated (mentally) women are!

M

Forums Beta

An untrustworthy colleague

Replies

Communities

Members

Services

Cities

Embed Videos